The Person You Think You “Should” Be Is Blocking Who You Are.
We spend years chasing a version of ourselves we were taught to become.
The responsible one. The calm one. The always-put-together one. The one who never falters, never slips, never lets the mask crack.
But here’s the truth nobody tells you:
The person you think you should be is the most significant barrier to who you already are.
Every time you force yourself to match that idealized image, you’re not evolving—you’re erasing yourself. You override your emotions. You ignore your instincts. You disconnect from the very strengths that make you extraordinary.
The exhaustion you feel? It’s not from lack of discipline.
It’s from living someone else’s script and calling it your own.
The Mindset Trap: “I Should Be More…”
Listen to the voice in your head:
“I should be calmer by now.”
“I should have it figured out.”
“I should be further ahead.”
“I should know better.”
These “shoulds” feel like motivation. They sound like standards.
But they’re not. They’re self-abandonment wearing an achievement badge.
Every “should” disconnects you from your present reality and floods your nervous system with impossible pressure. No amount of productivity hacks, morning routines, or positive affirmations can fix what’s fundamentally broken. You are trying to become someone you were never meant to be.
You don’t rise by becoming the person you think you should be.
You rise by meeting the person you are—with compassion, honesty, and radical acceptance.
Presence: Your Secret Weapon
“Just be present.”
“Just breathe.”
“Just ground yourself.”
You’ve heard it a thousand times. And maybe you’ve rolled your eyes a thousand times.
Here’s why: We’ve been taught that presence is passive. Soft. The opposite of ambition.
That’s wrong.
Presence isn’t about slowing down or doing less. Presence is your stabilizer.
It’s the anchor that lets you build without burning out. It’s the internal reset that stops the spiral of self-judgment and comparison. It’s what transforms your goals from anxiety-driven to alignment-driven.
Obsession builds momentum. Presence builds sustainability.
You need both. But only one keeps you whole.
Your True Self Isn’t Waiting in the Future
That version of you you’re chasing—the calm one, the confident one, the person who has it all together?
They’re not hiding in some future milestone.
They’re underneath the pressure you’re carrying right now.
Underneath the expectations. Underneath the performance. Underneath every “should” you’ve been carrying like a badge of honor.
You don’t need to become someone new. You need to let go of the version of yourself built for survival. It was built for approval. It was for narratives that no longer serve you.
When you stop trying to be who you think you should be, you make space. You finally create room for who you actually are.
And that person? Unstoppable.
A Gentle Reset for This Week
As you step into Monday, try this:
Pause. Breathe. Then ask yourself:
“What part of me am I abandoning when I chase who I think I should be?”
Don’t rush the answer. Let the question sit with you. Let it soften the edges. Let it bring you back home to yourself.
Your calm, grounded, powerful self doesn’t need to be achieved.
She just needs permission to exist.
If This Resonated…
Take one moment today to honor who you actually are—not who you think you should be.
Share your reflection. Reset your intention. Give yourself one honest breath.
You deserve to rise without abandoning yourself in the process.
— Myriam
Release – Reset -Rise
Email: myriam@myriamgareau.com
Website: www.myriamgareau.com
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